My partner is currently grieving, I took him on a walk to the woods and we picked wild garlic and took pictures of the bluebells. It’s making me remember how I felt when I lost someone, I feel like I repressed a lot of the sorrow, I know I was sad, I remember that, but I don’t remember how it felt. I remember how I got through it. I’m envious that I was only 16 at the time, my partner is much older, I wonder if that helps though.. because you’re never prepared, we’re given no rule book, we have no point of reference, just our own memories and experiences. But I know that, be it age difference, he’s doing amazingly.
So, I’ve realized i’m great at planning for the short term, there’s a lot to be said for living in the now, yes, but if i want to work for myself i must make a plan.
There’s certain things that university didn’t teach me (i’m thinking of doing a post on this of its own.. another story) things like what its like in the big, complex world of self employment and taxes.
I want to work for myself, i know that much. I knew this much a few months ago, now i know exactly what i want. And i think i can do it.
I wanted, at first, to run my own studio, maybe live there too, but i don’t want to be a general studio, i want to be a portrait studio. And realistically, i’ll have to already be rolling in it for that to work out as my only income. Then i realised studios arent the only line of work photographers can go into, basically, i want to open a shop/gallery/creative workshop space, selling local artists work, crafts, artwork, photography etc. Display and sell my own work and run workshops and studio sessions. (maybe natural light studio sessions..) I feel this is a way to showcase/delve into my other passions of photography and the creative world. I adore the physical elements of photography much more than constantly sitting on Photoshop, analog, recycled negatives, turning your prints into things other than prints.
Real art. Substance.
That’s what i want to be known for.
I’ve been looking at commercial spaces, gaining a larger library of portraits and getting advice from local businesses etc.
my natural light portrait shoot went so well it’s gathered attention from 5 or so other models who want to work with me, so i’m starting a little portrait business from my home studio, a series of shoots every week, a choice of travel costs covered or a Polaroid for £5 and all images free to use wherever with credit.
Its going really well, i have high hopes for the future 🙂
I was feeling inspired earlier, partly by the wonderful new pale blonde wig i bought, and ive set up a little daylight studio in the bedroom so i had a mini self portrait shoot.
used a 50mm 1.2 lens, daylight mimic bulbs, i used the awesome app that connects my phone to my camera to get it just right too.
I found this awesome artist too who inspired me to do something like these again, more test shoots with self portraits to come before my proper shoot on the 30th with my lovely model friend Emily
More on IG @_perfectlycandid
Watch this space! 🙂